I now find myself almost 2-1/2 years post-partum, even beyond the point I weaned my last baby. And yet, this time I feel so different. I am not ready to wean my daughter. What is the difference?
- My son was much larger, and she still seems like a baby
- I was getting anxious to have a second pregnancy and felt I needed to wean him to conceive
- My son had Asperger Syndrome and was irritating me quite a bit with how he nursed
All of these things makes me feel sorry that I "gave up" on my son and did not nurse him longer. It's not his fault he was big for his age--and he got less of a babyhood due to the fact. And his Aspergers put him in a position to require more nurturing, not less! We had a rough few years with him, and I have many regrets. But it has worked out, and now we are doing very well together.
Back to my daughter ... She is almost 2-1/2 and still going strong. She nurses several times a day. Some days she eats very little solid food. She nurses several times a night, and nurses to sleep still. Don't get me wrong, sometimes she can really annoy me, and sometimes I feel I have just had it with night-nursing....but not strongly enough that I would actually night-wean yet (that takes a large degree of patience and dilligence!). But she is just my little baby. She is sweet and innocent, not even 24 pounds yet.
I used to be more concerned about my weight and body image but now I don't care so much. I have gained 10 lbs in the past year just by working out, and I don't fit in my small clothes anyway. So now, I think I will try to keep my milk supply up, and if I conceive soon, I would be sure to eat plenty of calories to support breastfeeding. Hopefully I won't lose my supply like I did last time. I would like to nurse my daughter until she is 3, at least.